Notes of an Overthinker

Three months earlier, I wrote a blog about the young couples and the youth’s perception of love where I mentioned about the absurd things they do to get love and even absurd things they do once they are in love. Well, I don’t know if that’s love or not and I am sure neither do they, but that’s what they call it. And today, here I am, contradicting some of my earlier views about them. Today, I observed a brighter aspect of this whole phenomenon, which is much deserving to be appreciated. It is the absolute carefree attitude of the young couples. The moments when they are together with each other, they do not belong to this world of ours; they live in a world of their own. It’s like the idea Paulo Coelho mentions in his book, ‘The Winner Stands Alone’ that every person is a complete whole world within himself. They literally do not pay any attention to the people around them, what others say about them or who’s watching them; nothing seems ...

I came home after five months. All while this time, a number of things were wandering inside my head. Some worries, some expectations, a little planning for the future, a little regret for the past. All in all, I was in a state of total confusion. Nothing was making any sense to me. My status was quite like this quote of William Leal: “It’s all messy. The bed. The hair. The words. The heart. Life.” And, I knew this state of me could only be fixed after I go to my home. So, firstly, I was excited to go home, then I became anxious about it, then anguished, and finally totally desperate to be home. Slowly, actually very slowly, this time passed, and I was at my home. It was a long and a hectic journey but I was not feeling tired. I was feeling sleepy but I could not sleep. I was all so joyous and merry. And I realized, that all my worries and anxieties and regrets simply vanished. There was no trace of them in my mind. It was an ambience of pure happiness all around, and nothing at ...

“At the innermost core of all loneliness, there is a deep and a powerful yearning for union with one’s lost self.” – Brandon Francis Year 2014. After the board exams were over in March, I had decided that I would drop the year to prepare for the one of the toughest entrance exams for the most prestigious and aspired institute of the country – the JEE for the IIT. To realise this dream, I went to Delhi, again one of the most happening places in the country. However, even after months of preparation, I failed to achieve my goal; and whatever be the reasons for it I have no regrets. I will never say that I wasted my one year. And that is because, it would not be true if I said so; it is because that year gave me so much time – free time; lonely time; time to think. A little time for yourself is all you need to recollect and reset your life. A little time is what you need to know where you want to be and where you are heading in life. I got this little time in abundance and this ...

हम जिसे प्यार समझ बैठे हैं, वो आखिर है क्या? Small pecks on the cheek; looking deeply into each other's eyes; those moments of PDA in the coffee shops and hostel mess; or holding of hands in the shopping mall. Is it all love? Maybe it is too inspiring an effect of the Bollywood, or maybe something that happens too naturally at this age. Whatever it maybe, but it is surely not love. I am certain that it not love because love does not break every six months and because moving forward after a real breakup in not as easy as Yo Yo Honey Singh says. You do not ask your friends to hook up someone with you or to fix a meeting with someone in order to find your soul mate and you certainly do not propose someone only after five minutes of meeting them. You do it only because a girl round your arms compliments your ‘cool boy’ image and because that walking with a boy makes other girls jealous. You want to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend simply because everyone has one; you want t...

"What is this strange thing that I call myself?" This is what Kahlil Gibran quoted in his book of short writings, 'Sands and Foams'; and this is what I have been asking myself and searching for an answer. I have found that people, when they are all alone with me, are at peace. They share their darkest secrets with me. They tell me their life stories, speak about their crushes and loves, their achievements and also the regrets they have in life. People sometimes just talk to me for hours and pour out their hearts to me. They speak things they have never spoken to anyone, tell me their desires and ambitions and share their dreams with me. The important thing to notice is that they do all this very comfortably and willingly, on their own accord. They do not seem to have the slightest hesitation in sharing their lives with me. They somehow, and I don't know why, place full trust and faith in me. Who am I? Nothing more than a plain simple homo sapien. I am not ...

The social networking has gained momentum in our country from around 5 years ago and is a great hit among the masses. Almost everyone is a part of it. But, I believe, it never remained true to its motto. It never lived upto its real expectations. At least, so is the case in India, as far as my knowledge is concerned. I strongly feel that we people are great at diplomacy. We use something as it best suits us and not as per its purpose of use. Mostly, we tend to use a strong tool from its destructive end. The case with the social media is no different. The ill-effects of misusing the social sites have already started to come up. I am not talking about cyber scams and scandals but a change in the general mindset of the people. We are observing a drastic decline in the quality of thoughts, language and general attitude of the society. The worst affected are the children in the early teens. The young, fresh, innocent and clean minds are hampered the most. The social media, in the way it...

Situations are the moulding forces of our lives. We live as per the situations; we grow with the situations. Sometimes, we change them, but mostly it is the time and situation that has the guts to change a person. We all are submissive towards the situations and there is nothing to be ashamed of in bowing down before them or adjusting with them. It is totally natural. Many times, we find people telling someone, "If I were you, then I would have..." kind of statements. These are nothing but complete lies. The truth is that if you were in someone else's shoes you would have done exactly the same as the other person had done. In that situation you would have not been yourself but that very person. You would be moulded by the situation and then made the same decisions as the other person. Moving along with the situations and adjusting to the them quietly is not coward but a wise decision to make, if you cannot change them. Moreover, doing so is completely human.

We have always heard that life is a cyclic process; that there are ups and downs, one after the other in life. The downs are usually referred to as the dark phase of one's life or what we sometimes call the hard times. Everyone faces them, and everyone comes out of them too. But the struggle we make to overcome those challenges; we keep them to ourselves. We do not speak them out loud for no particular reason. Hence, everyone feels that he or she has worked the hardest or struggled the maximum to enjoy this happiness today. This increases the self-respect of people and they live a life of dignity, but sometimes this self-respect increases enormously without a reason and makes them egoistic. These struggles are something to share with people whom you are close to. when you do this, you come to know that the person infront has worked equally or more harder that you to achieve his or her current position. The awareness toward this fact changes your high self-respect into a mutual...

I love cloudy mornings. In fact, morning has its own beauty when the sun rises but the day does not. It feels as if the time has come to a stand still; It looks as if the clock is ticking but not moving. A quiet stroll on the streets on one such morning, with only the hue of blurred sunshine, all by yourself brings you closer to your inner being. And a road ride is beyond happiness; it is joyous. (By the way, I had one today morning) Today was this perfect morning in Delhi. A beautiful morning in a beautiful city. P.S. You need to wake up early for these experiences. :P

The monotonous and mechanical lives that we are living these days make me feel sorry for ourselves. We usually spend our whole day without giving a single thought to any of our actions. What a loss it is! 86,400 seconds wasted! We failed to live even a single of those moment! This makes us nothing better than robots. But, have you ever tried to sit and stare into empty blank space? Do it. 'Waste' some seconds for yourself. Try to enjoy the blurring visions. Do not let anything bother you. Let the mind take its own course. And then, when you are surrounded by a complete void, think! Think what are you doing and where it is going to lead you. Analyse your actions and make the best decisions. When you do this, you feel your existence. You know that you belong. And that realization is one of the most powerful driving force in the world. It always lets you choose the right path and propels you ahead on your way.

अक्सर ही हमें ये समझाया जाता है की ऐसे सपने जिनका सच होना मुश्किल हो, उन्हें  देखना व्यर्थ है क्योंकि वो तकलीफ देते हैं। यह बात सत्य नहीं है। सपनों का उम्मीदें बन जाना और उन उम्मीदों का पूरा न हो पाना तकलीफ़देह  होता है। सपने देखने में को हर्ज़ नहीं है। सपने हमें खुशी देते हैं और उनके सच होने की दिशा में बढ़ने की ताकत भी। सपने पतंग की तरह हैं, जिन्हे अगर ऊंचा उड़ना है तो उन्हें यथार्थ की डोर से बांधे रखना होगा। अगर ऐसा नहीं किया तो पतंग कहाँ जाके गिरेगी, ये किसी को पता नहीं। सपने देखिये, उम्मीदें न पालें। और यथार्थ से जुड़े रहें।

Acceptance is an important trait which must be a part of one's personality. It determines the broadness of a person. Everyone must accept everything. It doesn't matter how you take things, but you must take them in. That's what really matters. If we do not accept things, then we are confining ourselves in a shell; we are surrounding ourselves within some boundaries. And these boundaries, they are unreal, fake and non-existent. They are only our reluctance towards the thought of acceptance, thus narrowing the spectrum of our knowledge and making us unable to see and comprehend things as good or bad beyond a certain limit. It not only affects our social personality but also hinders our growth personally, as we put up resistance for new thoughts and ideas, making us an ignorant lesser mortal. We must know everything, let it be anything. We must be welcoming for thoughts, ideas, news, knowledge, teachings and any such thing, so that we can contemplate them and then know wh...

Satisfaction marks the end of growth. One must never be satisfied with all that he or she has. Satisfaction kills the desire to want more from oneself, to achieve more in life or to have anything that could be yours. If you are satisfied with your life, it means that there are things achievable but you are just too tired to have their comforts, be it something materialistic or spiritual. Your satisfaction with your life also shows that you have got nothing to live for and that there is no craving inside you. And, if that is the case, you better die. Never ever be satisfied with what you have got. We must always have something to achieve. We must always have something to die for, and that is what makes us live, work harder, and gives a driving force to life.

मुझे दिल्ली पसंद है, सर्दियाँ पसंद हैं और रात पसंद है। इसी वजह से मुझे दिल्ली की सर्द रातें बेहद पसंद हैं। इस शहर की हवाओं मे कुछ तो ऐसा है जिससे की सन्नाटा भी जम जाता है। कोई एक हल्की सी आहट भी नहीं होती; चारों तरफ एक खालीपन सा छा जाता है जिसमें केवल हम मौजूद हैं। और हम, रज़ाई लपेटे हुए खुद में ही सिमटते जाते हैं। हम खुद में ही समाय जाते हैं। खामोशीयाँ इतनी गहरी होती हैं ऐसी रातों में कि हम अपनी सांसें सुन सकते हैं। दरअसल, हमारी सांसें हमारे मन की आवाज़ हैं। दिल्ली की ऐसी सर्द रातों में हम खुद से बातें कर सकते हैं।

More than after two and a half years, I am writing this blog post. Thanks to my friend Moksh, who created his blog (mokshgoray.blogspot.in) and that was what made me remind that I too have a little space on this huge online world. I felt that maybe it's time to start writing once again. I hope that I will keep posting pieces from my heart here, a place where maybe no one will read them but still they would be here meaning to be read. :)